Some of my friends and I were talking about online dating the other day and one of them asked if we still do background checks on the dates we meet up with from online dating sites. I said that I still do, but some of my friends said that they don’t because they do social media searches now to find the date online and if they don’t like that person’s social media posts they cancel the meeting. And they asked me why I still bother with the hassle and expense of a background check. Here’s why I still the background check anyone I meet from a dating site:
People Lie On Social Media
I know that’s shocking, isn’t it? But someone can say that they have a great job or have no criminal record on social media and that doesn’t mean it’s true. They might not even be the person they claim to be on social media. Catfishing is a very real problem that online daters have to deal with. But a background check doesn’t lie. So I’ll continue to do background checks to make sure that the person isn’t lying about something big like their job, their name, or other important facts.
A background check will tell me for sure if the person that I am planning on meeting has a criminal record and if they do what that record is for. You can’t be too careful when you are meeting a stranger so I think it’s worth the cost to check out any dates I’m meeting officially and make sure they don’t have a mile long criminal history before I agree to meet them for a date.
When I meet a stranger from an online dating site I practice good safety protocols. I always let a friend or family member know where I’m going and who I’m going to meet. And I like to be able to give them that person’s real and verified name, address, and phone number just in case they need to come looking for me. People can and do lie about basic facts all the time so the smart thing to do is to make sure that you have all of their verified information before you meet them. Safety first.
Then my friends asked me if I ever tell my online dates that I have done background checks on them. And usually, I don’t, because that’s not really the kind of thing that comes up in date night conversation. There was one person I started dating seriously from an online dating site and about three months into our relationship I did tell him that I had a background check done on him before we went out the first time. He laughed and said he’d had one done on me too. And that didn’t bother me at all, just like my having a background check done on him didn’t bother him at all. These days it still is the smart thing to do to have a background check done on a stranger before you date them.